Easter Island

13 Feb

More will follow when I return to civilization. You might say considering what a remote and tiny spec of land this is, that it’s amazing I can show you a photo at all, but really that’s down to economics, not science. The technical capability is 50 years old. (I’m at the blue dot in the middle)

The weather is dreadful, so this was the best I could do:

PPT-IPC – Tahiti to Easter Island – LATAM Business Class

12 Feb

After a quick halt at the Intercontinental Tahiti (above), a 3am flight is the only option because Tahiti to Easter Island is not the busiest route in commercial aviation:

LATAM don’t have a lounge at Tahiti, only Air Tahiti Nui do. It’s in the Priority Pass network, so I could get in, except they close after their last flight, which is at midnight. So, 2 hours to wait for boarding in a shitty, hot, tiny island airport.

But joy, the last Air Tahiti flight is delayed, so they’re keeping the lounge open.

But no joy, the security and immigration controls are closed for LATAM passengers until 1 hour before the flight.

But joy, 5 minutes of relentless pestering and pretending not to understand them, and they give in and let me through, and I’m into the very quiet and air-conditioned lounge for a not bad selection of wines and sandwiches:

LATAM seating is not the best, and their food service is poor (and badly timed for a 3am flight) but all I’m going to do is sleep, and it’s good enough for that:

A very slow immigration process will leave you glad you were in business class because at 6th in the queue you’ll wait 30 minutes and the rest of the plane is behind you.

Then out into Rapa Nui, its indigenous name. A tiny spec of utterly unappealing ugliness miles from anywhere. Which also works as a caption for this photo of my hire car:

It’s a volcanic speck of shit in the middle of the Pacific and it makes you wonder why the hell you would choose to stay, especially in the wind and rain:

Take a drive to find some Moai, and even though it’s “closed”, it’s just a field so hop over the gate and try to keep camera and spectacle lenses free of rain for long enough to take some photos:

Bora Bora , French Polynesia

10 Feb

Taking a break from jetskiing around the lagoon. Look at how the clouds form as the air rises over Mount Otemanu.

A couple of hours chasing speedboats to jump their wakes, then a break on a “Motu” (island) to crack open some coconuts for a drink and a snack.

Trying to film from a wrist-mounted go-pro while bouncing around on a jetski is pretty tough, and it doesn’t show how incredibly brightly turquoise it is out here, and I didn’t get a shot of the eagle rays and manta rays we saw, but jetskis cost £250 for 2 hours, so you’re getting some videos anyway. Even if the hotel is free, don’t come to Bora Bora unless you expect to spend lots of money.

Watch this first one to about 1:50 to see how vicious even an easy, beginner-level wake jump is. Bloody good fun though. Can’t beat a Yamaha engine and a bit of air-time, whether land or sea:

Conrad Bora Bora Nui

10 Feb

The overwater villa is sensational:

This was my terrace and view at the underwhelming Intercontinental Le Moana:

But take a look at what you get at the Conrad. It’s even bigger than the Thalasso, the water is even clearer and bluer and has more fish, it’s even more private and as well as sun loungers there are hammocks built into the decking:

The resort is huge, but there are bikes all over that you can use to get around on (and sneak one into your villa so it’s still there for you to use first thing in the morning to go up to the hilltop viewpoint for sunrise):